Someone reminded me today that we haven’t nailed time travel yet, so there’s no going back only forward.
Our minds are constantly trying to keep us safe. They work in much the same way as our bodies do in this respect. Our minds take us back to moments in time when we were safe. When we were happy. Our minds can’t really feel safe in a future that has not happened yet.
When your life unexpectedly gets derailed it is very common for our minds to take us back to times it felt safe, when life felt safe. This has been quite a theme for me over the past few months. I often find myself drifting back to times when everything was ‘perfect’.
I am finding it particularly heightened at the moment. Especially after I have flown to the other side of the world. I feft my ‘safe’ life. Left my familiar support systems. Left my furry best friend. I have arrived with no plans. Not at all prepared. So of course my mind is constantly dragging me back to those safe moments.
Those safe moments were some of the happiest of my life. And yet the memory of them causes me so much hurt and pain. They are linked with the moment that felt like a massive earthquake rumble through my life that shook my foundations to its core. Yet still my mind takes me back there. My mind doesn’t make the link between those happy times and the sadness it brings.
Giving your feelings meaning.
The reactions we have to opposing emotions can be felt in a similar way in our bodies. When we are excited we get butterflies, our hearts race, our senses are heightened. When we are anxious we get a fluttering in our stomach, our hearts race, our senses are heightened. So how does our body know the difference between them. It is through our thoughts. The stories we are telling ourselves. We give those same feelings different meanings.
It is from this basis I have began to turn those happy memories that make me feel sad back into feelings that raise my vibration. It’s not labeling anything I’m feeling as good or bad. Nor is it trying to ignore the low vibration feelings. Its allowing them to move through me, to transform in me and leave me in a more contented place.
So what feelings are high vibration? A book I am currently reading Make It Happen by Jordana Levin (highly recommended!) gives the following examples of high vibration feelings: happiness, freedom, love, joy, gratitude, enthusiasm and abundance. They allow you to feel clear, calm and lighter. And those which vibrate on a lower frequency? Those feelings leave you feeling heavy, dense and can be downright physically draining.
Reprogramming the meanings.
I would like to share with you how I am currently doing this. And I don’t want to give you any delusions that this is a one time practice and magically you won’t be flung back into your past again. That is unfortunately not how it works. Remember what I said at the beginning. Our minds want to constantly keep taking us back to when we were safe. So it will keep taking us back there. This practice will help those memories become less painful.
But first… A quick background
This time last year I was gearing up for the end of the uni semester. Ahead of me I had just summer school and one more semester to complete and uni would be done! The end to the craziness that was non-stop work and uni was in sight. My current boyfriend and I had been in serious talks about trying for a child for the past couple of months. It had resulted in us deciding to start trying at the end of November. This would guarantee my due date would be past the end of my last semester at uni. This was if we fell first go. And to be quite honest I never thought that would be my story. Not with my history of challenges with my period.
I honestly felt like everything I had ever wished for in my life was within my grasp. I had a man who I loved with all my heart, who loved me back. The life we had been talking about since we met was coming together. The end to a particularly crazy period in my life was in sight. I was so near the finish line to graduating in an area I am super passionate about. There were times I was literally buzzing. I felt fulfilled, content, happy. The future was open to all kinds of possibility.
Fast forward a year and well that dream I had, it shattered. And not just once. You can read about that here.
Ok back to reprogramming those meanings.
As the year anniversary of that happy time is upon me, coupled with my current uncertainty of where life it headed I am flung back to those moments quite frequently at the moment. So when I get flung back to those moments, I allow myself to feel the loss, to honour how that makes me feel. Then I remember how I felt in that moment. And I mean I really feel it. I sit with the feelings of fulfillment, contentment and happiness until I feel lighter. Sometimes this can be less than a couple of minutes, other times it takes some work and the help of some guided meditations, some journaling or a nice walk. But each time those memories get a little less painful and I can remember them for the happy times they were. I do really need to remind myself daily, there’s no going back.
A lesson I have learnt in the past few months is that life does in fact move in cycles. Until I sat down here to begin writing I didn’t actually see that this is exactly what has happened. I find myself back at the point I was this time last year with the future open to all kinds of possibility, but in different circumstances with different surroundings.
Rather than feeling a sense of apprehension for what the future holds, of sadness for the life I have lost and of general all-round fear, I should remember how I felt this time last year as the world felt open and full of possibilities. How the feelings of anxiety and excitement are the same. How it takes just rewiring the stories, the thoughts we are telling ourselves about where we are, where we have been and were we are going; to make the switch between the low vibrational energy to the high vibrational energy. Because the only difference between now and this time last year is the story I am telling myself….
I invite you to notice where in your life you could tell yourself a different story. Allow yourself to feel into low vibrations one story may give you and contrast this with the high vibrations that a different story allows you to have. I love to hear how this works for you, so please reach out and let me know.
Remember we haven’t nailed time travel yet, so there’s no going back only forward.